How about a few good, clean jokes?

Someplace just to show that reel collectors do have a life
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1badf350
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Re: How about a few good, clean jokes?

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-Chris R.

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Re: How about a few good, clean jokes?

Post by Reel Geezer »

Triple crown winner Justify was invited to the white house but declined, stating "if I wanted to see a horse's ----, I would have came in second."
If we concentrated on the really important things in life there would be a shortage of fishing tackle

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Midway Tommy D
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Re: How about a few good, clean jokes?

Post by Midway Tommy D »

Reel Geezer wrote:Triple crown winner Justify was invited to the white house but declined, stating "if I wanted to see a horse's ----, I would have came in second."
Now that is one REALLY BAD joke. :roll:
Love those Open Face Spinning Reels! (Especially ABU & ABU/Zebco)

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arley
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Re: How about a few good, clean jokes?

Post by arley »

2 batteries walk into a bar.
bartender sez: you can come in but don't start nothin'.
you can tune a piano,but you can't tuna fish.

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Re: How about a few good, clean jokes?

Post by Reel Geezer »

A blind man enters a bar. After ordering a drink, and sitting there for a while, the blind guy yells to the bartender,

“Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?”

The bar immediately becomes absolutely quiet. In a husky, deep voice,the woman next to him says,

“Before you tell that joke, you should know something. The bartender is blonde, the bouncer is blonde and I’m a 6′ tall, 200 pound blonde with a black belt in karate. What’s more, the fella sitting next to me is blonde and he’s a weightlifter. The woman to your right is a blonde, and she’s a pro wrestler. Think about it seriously, mister. You still wanna tell that blonde joke?”

The blind guy says, “Nah, not if I’m gonna have to explain it five times.”
If we concentrated on the really important things in life there would be a shortage of fishing tackle

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Paul M
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Re: How about a few good, clean jokes?

Post by Paul M »

As posted on a certain Facebook fishing tackle related Group:

When I was ready to pay for my purchases of Bobbers and new rod, the cashier said, "Strip down, facing me."

Making a mental note to complain to the new fishing commission about the whacko’s running sporting good stores, I did just as she had instructed. When the hysterical shrieking and alarms finally subsided, I found out that she was referring to how I should place my credit card in the card-reader.

I have been asked to shop elsewhere in the future.

They need to make their instructions to us seniors a little clearer.
I still don't think I looked that bad.
Paul Manuel

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Midway Tommy D
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Re: How about a few good, clean jokes?

Post by Midway Tommy D »

:lol: :cool
Love those Open Face Spinning Reels! (Especially ABU & ABU/Zebco)

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Re: How about a few good, clean jokes?

Post by Harry Verdurchi »

Paul M wrote:As posted on a certain Facebook fishing tackle related Group:

When I was ready to pay for my purchases of Bobbers and new rod, the cashier said, "Strip down, facing me."

Making a mental note to complain to the new fishing commission about the whacko’s running sporting good stores, I did just as she had instructed. When the hysterical shrieking and alarms finally subsided, I found out that she was referring to how I should place my credit card in the card-reader.

I have been asked to shop elsewhere in the future.

They need to make their instructions to us seniors a little clearer.
I still don't think I looked that bad.

MAN OH MAN
When the ME TOO and AARP PEEPS GET a-hold of this you gonna be in BEEEEEEG TROUBLE

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Midway Tommy D
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Re: How about a few good, clean jokes?

Post by Midway Tommy D »

Harry Verdurchi wrote: MAN OH MAN
When the ME TOO and AARP PEEPS GET a-hold of this you gonna be in BEEEEEEG TROUBLE
The heck (being nice :) ) with them if they have no sense of humor & can't take a joke. :jester
Love those Open Face Spinning Reels! (Especially ABU & ABU/Zebco)

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Re: How about a few good, clean jokes?

Post by Chuck Gano »

a little kid on his first day at a a new school,teacher asks what his name is, kid replies snot-nose brown sir, everyone laughs and the teacher says ok ok that was funny now tell us your real name the kid says my name is snot-nose brown sir, teacher gets a bit angry and says we dont have time for this son tell us your real name or ill send you to the principals office , kid turns around to his little brother and says cmon dumbass there not gonna believe you either

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Re: How about a few good, clean jokes?

Post by Harry Verdurchi »

Kinda been around but still Funny this time of Year

There is a factory in Northern Minnesota which makes the Tickle Me Elmo toys. The toy laughs when you tickle it under the arms.

Well, Lena is hired at The Tickle Me Elmo factory and she reports for her first day promptly at 8:00 am.

The next day at 8:45 am there is a knock at the Personnel Manager’s door. The Foreman throws open the door and begins to rant about the new Employee.

He complains that she is incredibly slow and the whole line is backing up, putting the entire production line behind schedule.

The Personnel Manager decides he should see this for himself, so the 2 men march down to the factory floor. When they get there the line is so backed up that there are Tickle Me Elmo’s all over the factory floor and they’re really beginning to pile up.

At the end of the line stands Lena surrounded by mountains of Tickle Me Elmo’s. She has a roll of plush Red fabric and a huge bag of small marbles.

The 2 men watch in amazement as she cuts a little piece of fabric, wraps it around two marbles and begins to carefully sew the little package between Elmo’s legs.

The Personnel Manager bursts into laughter. After several minutes of hysterics he pulls himself together and approaches Lena .

“I’m sorry,” he says to her, barely able to keep a straight face, “but I think you misunderstood the instructions I gave you yesterday.”

“Your job is to give Elmo two test tickles.”

Image

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Re: How about a few good, clean jokes?

Post by Harry Verdurchi »

A man took his old duck to the Vet. because he
was concerned that the duck wasn't eating properly.
The Doctor explained to the man that as ducks age their upper bills grow down over their lower bills and make it difficult for the animal to pick up it's food.
The upper bill will need to be filed down even with the lower bill. But you must be extra careful because the duck's nostrils are located in the upper bill and if you file down too far when the duck takes a drink of water it will drown.
This surgery will cost you about 700.00 dollars
I think I can do this myself says the man and save that money it does not seem that complicated
About a week later the Doctor runs into the man at a local Bar and asks how is that duck of yours?

He's dead said the man.

I told you not to file his upper bill down too far! He took a drink of water and drowned didn't he?" insisted the Doctor.

No said the man.


I think he was dead before I took him out of the vise.

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